Yesterday I went to get my wedding dress hemmed. The seamstress is a family friend of Manu’s aunt and though she doesn’t do it for a living, she graciously offered her services to tailor my dress. If you had been a fly on the wall, you would have thought that she was my own family member, though we’ve only met once three years ago. She explained that I needed a little necklace, and if I wanted I could borrow hers! And if I’m doing my own makeup, she can lend me her brand new Sephora 50-shadow kit! And did I want some tea? How about cookies? And could I stay for lunch, too?
[a stop at a friend of a friend's house meant being offered ricotta pie and delicious tea]
This isn’t rare in Italy. In fact, society is rife with little acts of pure, selfless generosity like these. We went out to dinner Saturday night and my pizza was the last to arrive. Without thinking, one of Manu’s friends grabbed a slice of his pizza, before he even took a bite, to offer to me. Or if I’m standing around the piazza with friends, drinkless, someone is bound to offer some of theirs. When I go to a coffee bar, and I spot a person I know, they immediately they pick up the tab for both coffees.
All of these examples are implanted in their brains, like saying please or thank you. Generosity is a way of life. Even little kids are prone to share, like tiny grandmothers in the works, “Mangia, mangia!” offering you half of their chocolate Kinder bar.
It may sound like simple hospitality, but it goes further than that. It’s a demonstration of love and affection that’s missing in other societies. Maybe it's the strong Catholic influence of loving thy neighbor? Yes, Italians have their defects (i.e., never being on time), but their sense of generosity never ceases to make me feel absolutely at home and welcomed here.
Is generosity one of your strong suits?
I love this Marissa.
ReplyDeleteYou're right - I think that generosity is rare these days. In Canada, we're very polite and cordial with each other and often hold doors or say please & thank you (and 'sorry' far too often) but there's something about the thought of kindness and sincerity behind the generosity you speak of in Italy.
When we were in Cagliari a few summers ago, my parents and I were shopping in a tiny store. The owner recognized my dad from a few years prior, got all excited, and offered the three of us some sort of liquor from his back room. My mom and I at first were a little petrified to drink something that we didn't even recognize, but after a shot of whatever it was, we were all smiles :)
ReplyDeleteOMG, it is so true. When we were visiting Rome, we ate dinner at the same local mom and pop restaurant three times! They welcomed us each night and begged us to return. So, we did! We were given tastes of different Italian foods, we all tasted grappa with tiny biscotti for the first time. I had never experienced such hospitality. My friend spoke fluent Italian so we were able to visit with the restaurant owners all evening. If I ever go back, I shall go to that restaurant. Are you aware of a little restaurant in the Termini section called something like Smerelda or Esmereld....It's been so long I can't exactly remember. We loved it. (I love your blog)
ReplyDeleteoh I love that! it sounds like everyone is family no matter what :)
ReplyDeleteHospitality - just ONE of the many many reasons I LOVE Italy. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteThings are very simliar in Mexico. There have been a few posts of yours that make me see how similar Italy and Mexico are. Both Catholics too.
ReplyDeleteWell now I want to live in Italy. Such great examples of love and consideration for others. I wonder what the world would be like if more people were like that.
ReplyDeleteHow lovely! I'm sure sweet moments like these, definitely help any homesickness you may be feeling :)
ReplyDeleteyou're so right. :) is it like this in the LPV too?
ReplyDeletei think about that all the time! (not you living in italy, but people being nicer, though i would LOVE it if you lived here, haha!)
ReplyDeletelilly you're right! maybe it is a catholic thing then? :) hope you're well!
ReplyDeleteyes! i love it! :)
ReplyDeleteso true, everyone's like family. thanks b. :)
ReplyDeletethat's so great! i'm not surprised at all by that fabulous treatment! if i get to rome soon, i will definitely look up that restaurant! thanks dear!
ReplyDeletethat's hilarious! isn't it funny how that would never happen in the states? if someone offered you a shot from the back room? haha!
ReplyDeleteyou're right, americans are very formal as well with their "pleases" and "thank yous" but real generosity is missing. thanks jay!
ReplyDeleteYes! People are always trying to stuff me with food and drink! It's how I picked up the French 15 :)
ReplyDeleteI love this, such a refreshing change from the selfishness of so many! A great reminder to share with others :).
ReplyDeleteOh Italy <3 My boyfriend is Italian so we try to go visit 4-5 times a year and wow it is exactly like you describe! Generosity is to be found everywhere and their traditions are graceful and strong.
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